Is anybody out there?

I'm reaching out to anybody reading this, I think the Mayans got it wrong...I think the end of the world is...TODAY. 

Solid evidence to prove this theory comes in the form of a door, in particular, the door to my flat, which has decided to jam itself shut leaving me stranded with no food or water (ok, there's water but I just wanted to emphasise the severity of the conditions).

So if anyone is reading this and wants to come and give the door a shove from the outside let me know. I've tried pulling it but now the handle is coming off and I'd prefer to lock myself in and keep the strangers out than have an open house for anyone to come and go as they wish (unless they're bringing food). 

On the plus side, this could possibly be the most effective post-Christmas diet I have ever tried....

Donjuan x